Practicum Part 3

I knew it would come.  I think I have my resolution.  It came today in what I can only describe as a moment of spiritual revelation.  As usual, this will not translate into words very well.  But I'm documenting it anyway.

A new person started at work this week and guess what?  Yep.  Not married, but I have it on good authority.  It will be a hard road working amongst these rough field guys, and doubly so because he was sort of foisted on to them by a management decision.  I'm pretty sure this detail of his personality hasn't, shall we say...come out.

So today as I was leaving I had a desire to reach out and be friendly, even though this person doesn't work for or with me.  It was simply an offhand greeting with a little more friendliness than perhaps is typical.  Simple, but a reaching out nonetheless.  It stems from a desire to be Christ-like to others.  Caring for widows, orphans, and foreigners.

So then on the way home it hit me that I had a desire to reach out simply because he was an outsider and I understand how that could be hard.  Then from somewhere deep it flooded over me that it is wrong to create difficulty for people.  Not just wrong here, but wrong in my conundrum about marriage.  How could I imitate Jesus who didn't "break a bruised reed" if I was at all harsh or declarative about things I believe.  I would never do anything toward this person but show them respect and kindness, regardless of their situation, so it should be the same for everyone.

It wasn't an intellectual understanding.  It was less clear and more full.  Full of emotion and rightness, so I knew I had my answer.  Even this blog over this topic may be too much for people who don't at all understand where I'm coming from and I debated deleting these posts.  But then I thought it may serve more good to leave them as they stand in case someone stuggling with a similar issue may stumble across (or be guided to) them.  Perhaps it will be helpful.  Or maybe it could help someone who has been mistreated understand those who have been hurtful.  Plus, like Paul, if I must boast, let me boast in my failings because in them Jesus is shown to be who he is: the fullest revelation of God and the perfection of humanity.

So if my recent blogs have confused or estranged anyone in my seeming judgementalism, I sincerely apologize.  I ask that you come to know me before you judge me, just as you want others to do for you.  This was not about hatred or politics.  It has been a true chronicle of one person's struggle to deal with a surprising reaction in myself.

While I have not at all changed my beliefs on it all, you can be certain that I will not force them upon anyone or treat anyone wrongly because of my issues, God help me.

I am a complex and growing person, just like everyone else and we all have our issues that God is perfecting in due time.  I will aid this in myself and in others if I can.  But it is in his hands, not mine.  And where I am unsure or where my issues rub up against yours, I will try my best to not make things more difficult.